Thursday, August 28, 2008

SanGAt BeST!!

Kau membuat, ku berantakan
Kau membuat, ku tak karuan
Kau membuat, ku tak berdaya
Kau menolak ku, acuhkan diri ku

Bagaimana, caranya untuk
Meruntuhkan kerasnya hati mu
Ku sadari, ku tak sempurna
Ku tak seperti, yang kau inginkan

Kau hancurkan aku dengan sikap mu
Tak sadarkah kau telah menyakiti ku
Lelah hati ini meyakinkan mu, cinta ini, membunuh ku....

Finally, dapat juga aku cari group yang nyanyi lagu ni.. :) Aku sangat seronok sebab sehari suntuk aku nyanyi lagu ni tapi liriknya salah..ahaha..since aku tak pandai nak upload lagu masuk dalam blog ni, korang tak dapatlah nak me, it is a great song!! Kenapa aku kata lagu ni best? Sebab bila aku dengar lagu ni, aku terus terduduk, terkesima..pergghh..dahsyat kan? This song is by D'masiv, a group from indonesia. Lagu-lagu dari seberang memang best. The melody and the lyrics is so melts my heart *sigh*

Thursday, August 21, 2008

UntoLD sTOry

I had tough week. Time seems to stop moving. My heart aches like crazy. I've gone through this before and i just couldn't do it all over again..

Pretending to be fine is my great specialty..hahaha! Acting as if everything is ok, has becoming a lot easier. Want to know the secret? You just have to use the right emoticons! No one will notice that you are actually faking it. The power of technology has help me and others to hide our true emotions. But still, you can't lie to the end of the day, you will feel a lot worse than you could ever imagined!

The more i tried to ignore it, the harder it gets me. I tried my hardest not to think about it, and i always! When i slowly getting my life back like it used to be, this huge mix of emotions bothered me so much and i feel like screaming my lungs out!! I'm finally free, free from everything and everyone, i just don't need this right now. Arghhh..just give me a brake..and plenty of spaces. Is it too much to ask?

I'm praying that i can be more brave and strong to face this test from ALLAH swt. Its getting tougher day by day. I'm feeling weak and i feel like i can't overcome it. I'm starting to think, i will never get my way out from all this..what can i do? What should i do?

Crying is not the best solution, but it helps! I sat at the balcony of my house, during midnight..and i cried, and cried and i thought i would never stop. The dark open sky was my witness, and maybe few mosquitos. I sat there almost an hour. Thinking and praying for all this to go away. Hoping that, tomorrow everything will be normal once again. Well has it..?

Alhamdulillah, its getting better. I keep telling myself, all this has been written in my destiny. I already accepted it, before i was born into this world. There will be an end to everything, my prayers will be answered..i believed it with all my heart. I know i'm not alone. I know my friends will help me if i let them, but i need to figure this out myself. Insya-ALLAH, i will not give up. I never give up before, and i am not planning to do so! Ya-ALLAH, please help me to get over this, please guide me so that i know what to do, give me strength..because right now, it is all that i need -amin-

p/s: for someone who would like to keep her personal feelings, personal..i failed miserably..huhu